Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
Randomize