Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize
