I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
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