? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize