You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Randomize