Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
Randomize
