I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
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