well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
