so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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