He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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