Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
