I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
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