Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
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