Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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