Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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