he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Why can't burritos get me drunk
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Randomize
