then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Randomize
