Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize