There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
