if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Everything about him screamed your future.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize
