Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
