Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Randomize
