I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
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