I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
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