that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
