just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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