Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Are my feet made of real feet?
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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