Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize
