Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize