When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize