my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
