K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
