It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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