we're blogging at a bar
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Randomize
