new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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