nut hugger
I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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