sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
My dick has a subreddit
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
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