Your face is a jimmy john
i will never coherently bang her
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
