That's intense
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
