why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
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