I'm going to jail i love you
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
Randomize
