so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Randomize
