Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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