Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
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