guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Randomize
