I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
You brought string cheese to the strip club
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
