used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
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