wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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