Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
