mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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