im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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